Why Should I Blog?

So why write a blog? Isn't it the "in" thing to do these days? Wouldn't it be a really cool, responsible things for me to do? Document my life? I have always loved writing and pouring my feeling out on paper. Somewhere along the way in my life as a little girl, I got in my head that I couldn't write well. And that was that. No writing allowed. A couple of years ago, we went on a family road trip that lasted 15 months and I blogged about our travels. My main focus with that blog was to stay in touch with our families and keep a more accurate memory of our travels. Well, lo and behold, I opened a creative portal into my soul! I love to write! And wonder of wonders, people liked it. I even had comments that my writing was great and I should write a book. And due to my high need for approval, that made me feel wonderful. So what happened? Why did I stop?

Well, the RV trip ended and we now have stuff. Stuff to clean, stuff to buy, stuff to take care of, stuff to do, stuff to learn, stuff to grow, stuff to feed. Commitments! I keep saying that I want to write and I will set little goals for myself, "I will write every single morning of my life forever" and then never do it. I'm just too busy. I got quite content with our simple little life on the road and I think I am still struggling, over one year later, to integrate back into "normal". Well, normal for us anyway. We have never been "normal". I am still not sure if I am going to do this the way I would like to do this. But for this morning of forever, I am.

Positives to blogging: I get to express myself creatively. I get to document my life and more importantly, my kids lives. I can share with our distant family and friends our goings on. Maybe I will become a national hit and receive a Bloggie. I will get a book contract and then get to retire. Wait....what was I talking about?

Negatives to blogging: I don't have time. I feel guilty about not finishing yet another thing. When I blog, my family and friends feel like they are in contact with me and stop calling and writing. Seriously, a one-way relationship develops. I don't like the feeling of people judging my "bidness". I don't know who the "they" are that I think are following me around judging me, but "they" are there.

So, here I go. Thanks to Rebecca and Jill for convincing me I should blog again. It feels really nice.

So Why DOES Timothy Have Dread Locks?

I have been asked this question many times and we have gotten "the look" countless more and the simple answer is: because it is his hair! But the truth underneath that answer is a bit more complicated. Timothy has had an aversion to getting his hair cut all the way back to the first time. I have been covered in cut hair more times than I care to remember because he had to sit on my lap for the hair cuts. He has eaten his body weight in hair-covered lollipops in failed attempts to appease him. He has shed lots of tears. I have shed lots of tears. Why go through all of that you ask? Because, "the boy needs a haircut". Because he has crazy hair that looks better cut. Because I wanted to be a good mother and at that point in time for me that meant to have good looking kids. We have also shed many a tear over hair brushing. Timothy has course, boofy, tangle-prone hair so brushing has always been rocky. As his hair got longer, as the hair cuts got fewer and farther between, the more tangles came.

After a horrible, horrible hair cutting attempt over a year ago, I finally came fully to my senses.

I have been slowly getting there, but this was the proverbial straw. No more hair cuts. I didn't care how long his hair got. I vowed to not cut it again until he asked. Letting go of brushing took me a while longer. For the record, Timothy has not once ever wanted his hair brushed.

Ever. I have tried everything. Conditioner, detangler, bribes, silly songs and even harsh

words. All in an attempt to tame his hair. What I hadn't tried is letting go. Letting go of my own need to control what is his. One day, I finally had total clarity. It's just HAIR! I have been slowly breaking my child's spirit, year after year, so I could feel good about the way he looked. What was I teaching him? That his desires around his own body didn't matter? That only what I wanted him to be was important? I even told him once that he should brush his hair because other people might think badly of him. You know what he told me? "Mom, you said that we shouldn't care about what other people think". There you have it. Words of wisdom coming from my then 6 year old. He's right you know. Now none of us care what his hair looks like, what we care about is that Timothy is happy and secure in himself (in spite of us!).

Farmers

Tuesdays are our day to spend with a group of wonderful unschooling families. Usually we go to a park or meet in our neighborhood, but today we went to a farm. A local couple has lived on and worked this farm for 41 years. The lady now has breast cancer and the man recently had surgery, so they are unable to bring in their harvest this year and are struggling with all the work a farm requires. So unschoolers to the rescue! We went and picked grapes and raspberries and tomatoes and peppers. Then in exchange for getting to keep the produce, we raked and hauled some wood.

We were told we could take home what we picked, so the boys said that they wanted to carry their raspberries home "in their bellies". They spent a huge amount of time picking and directly eating the raspberries. Miranda tried them for the first time and decided that she loved them and proceeded to eat some, very slowly as is her style.

The most amazind part of the day for me was watching my kids just go and gain

a little confidence and explore a bit. Joey has always fancied himself a bit of a Steve Irwin, but I don't think ever had quite the confidence to go out and catch snakes. Probably because of me and the caution I bring to those opportunities. Well today, we both just let go. At one point, a very small garder snake crawled right across my foot as I was walking and while maintaining my composure, I managed to yell, "Hey, here's a snake" and then was immediately swarmed by a gaggle of wild, free children ready to catch it. They did and passed it around and then set up a habitat for it. Joey decided that there must be more and started hunting. He spent 2 hours hunting snakes, digging in the brush and under leaves. He caught two more small ones and a larger one as well. It as if he was channeling Steve Irwin himself. I had a few fears of "what if he catches a poisionous one instead?" But had to let that go. I was really proud for him, but more importantly, I think he was proud of himself.

We got three plastic grocery bags full of a variety of grapes. Having already made more grape jelly than we will use this year, we decided to make grape juice. Miranda, having absolutely no interest in catching snakes, wanted to help me with this when we got home. All we

did was wash them, take them off the stem, puree them in the blender and then strain them. We discovered that just that is too strong, so we use one part grape juice to one-two parts water and add a tiny bit of sugar. Miranda was really getting in to making the juice and understanding the process and experimenting with the finding the right mixture. I

had to run out for a little bit and left Miranda to continue with making the grape juice. Now Miranda loves food and not just in her mouth, but on her hands and on her body and on all of the space around her. Food is simply another art medium for her. So I was a bit surprised when I returned and she was still making the juice and hadn't gotten the least bit "creative".

I am enjoying this bounty of the land and learning new ways and revisiting some old to preserve it. It is wonderful to have the space in my life to do this.

Loving the Relaxed Life

Oh how we love the unschooling life.  Now that we have had the taste of freedom that comes from living without school for 18 months, I can't imagine how we could ever go back.  Being able to go at our own pace in the morning without having to rush is a gift I am completely grateful for.  "Mom, will you read me a book?"  "Mom, can we play a game?"  "Mom, I want to be a geologist when I grow up, can you help me learn all about geology right now?!"  Yes, yes and yes!  To have the time and space to be able to say yes is luscious.

I used to treasure my evenings after the kids went to bed as my "alone" time and my time to get things done that I wanted to do.  But these days, the kids are staying up as late as or later than us, so I wake before them and have my coffee, check emails and make a list of ideas I have for the day.  No matter how relaxed I get, I will always be a list person.  It isn't a curriculum or an agenda, just ideas that have popped into my head and maybe a few things I must get done.

Today I bought a mini fridge, on craigslist of course!  I am stumbling into making cheese.  Last week I made mozzarella (look for a posting on this soon).  This week I want to make some soft cheeses.  Maybe next week, cheddar.  Although I still need to figure out a way to press the cheddar.  So the fridge?  I need to let many of the cheeses age for many months at a constant 55 degrees.  Since our basement is occupied and therefore heated, that is out.  Some of my neighbors have a ground fridge (aka deep hole in the ground).  Buying a used mini fridge was much simpler that that!  Maybe someday we will dig.